By way of tying up loose ends.

Wherein I finish 18 days worth of truth in one sitting. I told you I was a professional list maker-- I couldn't deal with the fact that this list was not done.

Day 13 → A band or artist that has gotten you through some tough days. (write a letter.)

Dear Paul McCartney, Gwen Stefani, Phantom Planet and John Mayer,

All of you have written or performed some songs that have really affected me in one way or another at different times in my life. Paul, you are like another member of my family. Gwen, you are so real and expressive of your emotions and experiences that you have helped me to be myself since high school. Boys in Phantom Planet, I miss you all together so much. Your music helped me through some angry times, and also exposed me to a new, adventurous way of life. And Mr. Mayer, as disappointed as I am in your newfound love of being filmed by TMZ, I can't deny that the large majority of your music has spoken to the exact place that I am in in my life.

Thank you all.

Day 14 → A hero that has let you down.

John Mayer, when he stopped being a poet and started being a player.

Paul McCartney when he married Heather "The Cripple" Mills.

In real life? Seeing cigarettes in my 3rd grade teacher's purse was the first time when someone I looked up to became a hypocrite in my eyes.

Day 15 → Something or someone you couldn’t live without, because you’ve tried living without it.

Caffeine, Sugar, Carbs, Soda, John, Cheerios

Day 16 → Someone or something you definitely could live without.

Going to the Hat and watching John scarf down chili fries, driving in traffic, waiting in line, stupidity in general

Day 17 → A book you’ve read that changed your views on something.

I am a big fan of African American literature, trying to climb into the experience of being black in America at different times in our history. Some of my favorite books are Their Eyes Were Watching God by Zora Neale Hurston, Invisible Man by Ralph Ellison and Song of Solomon by Toni Morrison. Even children's books like To Kill a Mockingbird by Harper Lee, Bud Not Buddy Christopher Paul Curtis and Let the Circle Be Unbroken by Mildred Tayler have made me think about how different cultures relate. These books are complicated and do not make race and culture easy to understand, but make you think about your place in the world.

Slaughter House 5 by Kurt Vonnegut is hands down my favorite book. It is an unflinching look at the affects of war on everyone involved, and is based on the author's true experiences as a prisoner of war in Dresden, Germany during World War 2.

Day 18 → Your views on gay marriage.

I believe that God created Marriage, so I will let Him explain it.

Genesis 2:20-25, Deuteronomy 24:5, Matthew 19:4, Romans 1:28-32.

These verses are available on biblegateway.com for more perusal. I am also available privately for questions and comments.

Day 19 → What do you think of religion? Or what do you think of politics?

I think it is apparent from my previous answer that I believe in God. My reasons for this belief are plentiful, everything from His written word, to the created world around us. But I believe more in the power of sharing my reasons face to face, if you are ever interested.

For now, let me say quote this from Ecclesiastes 12:13-14:

"Let us hear the conclusion of the whole matter:
Fear God and keep His commandments,
For this is man’s all.
For God will bring every work into judgment,
Including every secret thing,
Whether good or evil."

As for politics, it is a waste of time and breath, in my opinion.

Day 20 → Your views on drugs and alcohol.

I guess you can call me a teetotaler. Drugs and alcohol are dangerous items that can easily get out of control. I know there are people who will say that a drink here and there is different than taking drugs or being an alcoholic, but my question is this: why flirt with something that can affect your life so profoundly in a negative way? I would rather stay very far away from something that can hurt me or someone else.

"Can a man take fire into his bosom and not be burned?" Proverbs 6:27

Day 21 → (scenario) Your best friend is in a car accident and you two got into a fight an hour before. What do you do?

I am not sure if it makes me a bad person or not, but I have no idea how to answer this question. I don't really have a best friend, other than John, so that changes the question a bit. If John was in an accident, whether we had just had a fight or not, I would probably instantly panic. Since it is likely I would have no idea where is was at the time of his accident, I would probably just cry and go to my parent's house to figure out what to do.

Day 22 → Something you wish you hadn’t done in your life.

Waste time. Being scared, being tired, being sad, being nervous, being or feeling anything that limited me from experiencing something I could learn from or enjoy.

Day 23 → Something you wish you had done in your life.

I have been pretty happy with how things have gone so far. I wish I had been braver about trying new foods when I lived in London. I used to wish that I had lived in a dorm in college, or that I had gone away to a beautiful campus rather than a commuter school like Cal Poly, but I think things worked out well in the end. I wish I had a tight circle of friends that I have a history with, and while I do to a certain extent, and I am thankful for them, I wish I had learned to be patient and to invest time in a variety of relationships sooner.

Day 24 → Make a playlist to someone, and explain why you chose all the songs. (Just post the titles and artists and letter)

I am not sure why this idea popped in my head, but I want to do a play list for my future children. The songs that I think are about them, or the songs that I hope they will like. It could turn into something really long and mushy, but I am going to try to keep this short. Believe me, I am tempted to try to write a reason why I chose each song, but that would make it too emotional and overwhelming. Look up the songs on itunes to see if you can figure out why I picked them. :)

"Wildflowers" by Tom Petty

"My Brave Face" by Paul McCartney

"All my Loving" by the Beatles

"Do You Realize?" by the Flaming Lips

"Beautiful Boy" by John Lennon

"Crazy" by Patsy Cline

"Under Control" by the Stokes

"Simple Kind of Life" by No Doubt

"My Father's Eyes" by Eric Clapton

"Universe & U" by KT Tunstall

"Landslide" by Fleetwood Mac

"Reflecting Light" by Sam Phillips

"Let Your Soul Be Your Pilot" by Sting

Day 25 → The reason you believe you’re still alive today.

Because there is a purpose for this life that God gave me, and I am still working on fulfilling it.

Day 26 → Have you ever thought about giving up on life? If so, when and why?

There would definitely be times in my life that I would classify as leaning toward depressed. My dad has termed it "the fog" when it feels like you are wandering, unable to see the future, but also unable to turn around a go back to simpler times. John Mayer called it the "quarter life crisis." These times occurred the strongest in college and before getting hired as a teacher. They were starting to come on again before meeting John. I am happy to say that as bummed as I have been in my life, there was always the tiniest bit of perspective that told me that it would get better, that I was only in a sad chapter in the book of my life. So no, I have never thought about giving up.

Day 27 → What’s the best thing going for you right now?

It may seem silly, but having breath and purpose will always be the best things going for me. As long as I have those things, I will have everything.

Day 28 → What if you were pregnant or got someone pregnant, what would you do?

I am happy to report that my answer to this question is probably better now than it would have been even 6 months ago. Don't get too excited, though, because that just means that I wouldn't go jump in a lake like I might have wanted to if I found this out earlier in my marriage. I am gently and ever so slowly coming around to the idea that being pregnant wouldn't be the worst thing in the world.

But honestly, if I found out that I was right this second, I would go online to figure out my due date. I would then go into HYPER planning mode about when I would go on maternity leave, what sub I would choose, figuring out changes to our insurance, would I go back to teaching full time right away?, who will watch the kid?, will I be finished with my masters? how can we change our budget now to be ready? etc. etc. etc.

Day 29 → Something you hope to change about yourself. And why.

I want to be more patient because I get to stressed when silly things don't go my way.

I want to see food as fuel, and nothing more.

I hope to be a good wife to John, meaning that I am willing to sacrifice for him, but also that I am able to help him grow. Sometimes I think I am too hard on him, because I love him so much and I want him to see how awesome he is.

Day 30 → A letter to yourself, tell yourself EVERYTHING you love about yourself

Dear Molly,

What you need to know the most, friend?

That you can do anything you put your mind to. You were raised to believe that God has given you everything you need, and that you are able to operate within your current abilities and meet any goal or obstacle in front of you. Where did this self doubt come from? Hasn't this been proven? Think back to all of the times that you worried about something, worried about your response or your actions. Did that help you at all? Sometimes things ended up working out exactly how you wanted, rendering worry useless. Sometimes things didn't work out exactly how you wanted but they were better or you learned something. Still, the worry was useless.

Trust your instincts, friend. They have gotten you pretty far, and will continue to do so.

It is not wrong to feel that you are doing a good job. It is not wrong to feel that people like you and they want you around. Don't assume that you know what people are thinking, or that they are as impatient with you and you tend to be with them. (Stop doing that, by the way.) It is not wrong to be organized and foreward thinking, but it is wrong to be bossy and controlling. Think about how your words sound, and make sure you are "imparting grace to the hearer."

I love that you are frugal, that you can be silly and exhuberant and that you think your husband is the best thing ever. I love that you have opened your heart to your dogs, even when you didn't really want to. I love that simple things make you happy, and that even though you can be very serious and quiet, you do love to laugh. I love how you can make even ordinary things special, and that there are very few memories that you forget.

I love knowing where you come from, and watching where you will go.

Love, me